thebackstage | IT'S CURTAINS TEST DRIVE

1) CURTAINS UP
You’ve just woken up in a small dressing room, which is certainly not where you went to bed last night. Actually, do you even remember going to sleep…? Regardless, this isn't where you last were, and if you leave your room you’re going to find a lot of other people in the same state.

Go out and socialize! Most of these people may be strangers, but you’re gonna all have to get used to one another. And who knows? There may actually be a familiar face in the crowd.

2) THIS PETTY PACE
By now, you're acquainted with everybody here and you're sloooowlllyyyy growing bored. Bored enough to kill? Hopefully not. You'd better try to find something else to do. You can always go hang out with your castmates, or maybe try and whip something up in the kitchen! There’s also a music room to keep you busy! I sure hope you like music.

3) BREAK A LEG
Comedies are fun and all, but that’s not quite what we’re about here. You’ve all just been handed this week’s motive. What do you make of it? Is it one that might actually tempt you to kill, or did you get off lightly this time? Either way, maybe you’d better look around the room and see who else is having a rough time.

4) CURTAIN
It was bound to happen eventually. Someone is dead, and now it's time to go off and investigate. Were they close to you? Are you, perhaps, feeling guilty? Either way, it's probably best not to leave anyone alone right now.

5) CUE MUSIC
Feelings in a murder-opera can get pretty gosh darn intense. Sometimes you’ve just got to let it out. And hey, if you sing a song about whatever’s going on in your head, maybe someone will hear and come help you? Either way, this is a musical – there’s not really any reason not to sing.

[Mod Note: The song mechanic is meant to be fluid and simple. You do not have to produce your own song lyrics, nor are you required to use show tunes (although we do encourage it!). If you want to rewrite existing lyrics to fit the situation, go for it! Anything goes - if Mumford and Sons expresses your character’s current emotions, then break out the banjos. We want to keep the musical mechanic as fun and simple as we can to encourage our players to use it as much as they like.]

6) WILDCARD
Make up your own prompt!

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[curtains up]

[This isn't his bed, it's too comfortable for that. After a few seconds, he realizes it isn't Hold-Me-Touch-Me's, Kiss-Me-Feel-Me's, Lick-Me-Bite-Me's, Yank-Me-Spank-Me's, and most certainly isn't Suck-Me-Fu...well, it isn't any of their beds.

That leaves one option, and thus, Bialystock can be seen roaming the halls with some sort of makeshift weapon. Not really so much of a weapon as he is holding the hat-rack from his room like a moron.]

Oh, Franzzzyyyy, oh Mr. Liepkindddd~! I know you're mad at Maxy Waxy about your play-e way-e, but you can't just kidnappp a famous produceeeerrr~

[the petty pace]

[Max Bialystock is a man of wealth and taste, who eats the finest foods and bangs only the richest senile old women. So when he comes down to the kitchen in his regal red bathrobe and starts going through the cabinets, he's pretty disappointed in the selection.]

Canned foods, let's see what we've got here! Mm. Oysters. Oil. [immediately groaning] Oy vey.

[cue music]

[So, all the murders might be getting to Max juuuusssttt a little bit. and a tune starts

Just watch them plot their schemes and plan for the slaughter,
I know exactly what I'll have to do,
It's undeniable, these guys are liable
And if I don't do something than I'll be the one who is dead...

[Dude. DUDE. Fucking same. What even is half this garbage, are they really expected to eat this? Raoul looks over from where he's rummaging around in the freezer, which is admittedly a wondrous device, but how even do you boil water? Raoul doesn't know.]

Those are by far the saddest looking oysters I have ever laid eyes on. [He shakes his head and goes back to digging, wrinkling his nose as he pulls out a box of fried clam strips.] Eugh. Is this really what passes for seafood here?

[There's a soft drumming sound coming from the wall, where Towey is drumming its vines against the wall dejectedly. Aww. The plant thinks its people. ]

Tell me about it. I've heard about bad grub before, but this place has got some real slim pickings.

[Except for you, Max. You look delicious. ]

IT'S CURTAINS TEST DRIVE

Max Bialystock | The Producers

The Petty Pace

The pretty place